Check this sneaky little guy out.

An e-mail featuring our feathered friend here recently made the rounds, touting him as Point Pleasant Beach native who robbed a local convenience store. It popped up in my inbox a couple weeks ago and made me chuckle (OK, more like full-on guffaw, but when you’re trapped in an office it’s the little things that count). I forwarded it to my co-workers, friends and family and was all pleased with myself for coming across it.

Supposedly, this crafty seagull sneaks into front door of the store and pulls a bag of Doritos – always Nacho Cheese – off a shelf with his beak, walks out with it and digs in. People have found this so hilarious that they come stand outside and watch. The proprietor is happy because the charlatan’s audience pays for his snack and probably pick up a few things for themselves.

Well, I had to know where in Point this happened so I could see him in action for myself. I hit Google and typed in “seagull stealing chips” and discovered, courtesy of urban legend site Snopes.com, that this happens in Scotland, not here at the Shore.

Frankly, it’s a little relieving to find that our seagulls haven’t developed a superior intelligence that allows them to pillage our stores. Anyone who has ever attempted to eat a meal on the beach knows this is for the best. I’ve seen them divebomb children’s snacks. One day this summer, a friend had a water bottle wrapped in aluminum foil and one of these winged thieves assumed it was a sandwich and tried to fly off with it. You can always tell the new people on the block because they leave their trash on the curb in white garbage bags. By morning, the bastards have shredded the bags and strewn the trash all over the street. Trash cans, people, trash cans.

And how about those crazy, stupid people who feed the damn things and then wonder why they get pooped on? That was one beach rule that we sadly over looked in this summer’s Beach Etiquette post. Families of tourists circle up their chairs in the an area the size of a small country and merrily toss pretzels into the chair and fuss over the flock that hover above them. Then, white drops start raining.  Guess who’s not so happy anymore.

Last summer, the Star-Ledger’s shore blogger caught an airborne attack in action. The video doesn’t include the showering of food that drove the gulls to descend upon Point’s tourists, but let this be a lesson. Please don’t feed the birds. Hitchcock was onto something.

For more hilarious photos of unsuspecting Britons having their frozen treats stolen straight out of the sky, check out Kontraband.